JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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