I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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