It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
