Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
