this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
