question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize