If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
