Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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