Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
