"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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