You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
