i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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