I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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