Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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