i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Of course I have a pirate flag
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
