Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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