the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
