Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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