I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
