Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
