let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I need a beard to bite.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
