i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
