dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Congratulations! We have a period
So here I am, sexting at work.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
