K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
