am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize