I just made out with a guy for $7.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
