We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
