Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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