I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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