oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
