what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
50% drunk capacity currently
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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