How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
