Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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