Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
