Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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