She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize