Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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