Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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