My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
