i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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