We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
