I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize