that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
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