So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
