There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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