How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
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