he shaved USA in his pubs
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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