Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
