My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
