they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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