i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
